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Relationship Quiz
Whether you realize it or
not, you created the life you are living. Your unique inborn nature, and the lessons you learned growing up, prepared
you to do just what you have done up until now. And, as I'm sure you know, some of what you've brought upon yourself
doesn't serve you very well at all. Of course, you have the power to change all of it going forward. But, you need
to understand how you got here in the first place if you are to be successful in doing that.
I want you to start looking back and considering the following questions. I've created a list of questions for
self-reflection that taps into many common themes.
· Were you too anxious to find a partner?
· Did you agree to the first proposal that came your way even if
it wasn't the best fit?
· Did you "settle" for your mate?
· Have you been too quick to believe or trust him?
· Did you give your partner the benefit of the doubt when,
perhaps, you shouldn't have done
so?
· Did you get married to please your parents?
· Did you commit when you were too young to understand
what you were doing, and stay because
it took a long time
to figure out what being married
really meant?
· Did you make decisions to commit to or stay in your
relationship from a place of fear…fear
of abandonment,
a ticking biological clock, financial
worries, or child support
and care?
· Did you commit because it was supposed to come next…go
to school…get job…get married?
· Did you get married because you already sent out invitations
and made wedding plans? Or stay
in a marriage because
you had this big fancy wedding?
· Did you tolerate unhappiness in your partnership for years
without realizing its significance?
· Did you isolate yourself from friends and relatives who might
have offered you a useful perspective
or some support?
· Were you too giving or too thoughtful?
· Did you keep secrets?
· Did you forgive the unforgivable?
· Did you stay with a philanderer for a long time hoping he
would change?
· Did you try too hard? Or not hard enough?
· Did you expect too much or too little back?
· Were you too responsible, or not responsible enough?
· Did you push your sexual needs down, disconnect from
them or experience unmet desires?
· Did you view sexual activity as a duty as opposed to a
pleasure?
· Were you sexual when you didn't want to be…or in ways
that were uncomfortable for you?
· Did you stay in the relationship for sex, even if the rest of
your partnership was bad?
· Did you keep setting deadlines for changes that needed to
occur, and stay even though nothing
got better?
· Were you used or abused?
· Did you stay because of what other people might say if
you left?
· Were taught to see longevity of marriage as a virtue…no
matter what?
· Did you look to your partner to complete you? To make
you happy? To meet all your needs?
· Did you choose, or stay with, a gorgeous guy because he
was gorgeous - even though he treated
you badly?
· Were you trying to be everything to your partner?
· Were you living someone else's model?
· Did you find yourself using food, alcohol, spending/shopping
or any other behavior to self-soothe
because you were
so unhappy or so anxious?
· Were you honest and open with your partner? Was he with
you?
· Did you doubt yourself too much or not enough?
· Did being in the relationship become habit or routine? Did
you stay in it without thinking?
· Were you too self-critical or too critical of your partner?
· Are there things you wish you had known sooner?
· Were you too polite, lady-like, careful not to offend?
· Were you the person you want to be?
· Just who do you want to be?
· What do you want to change going forward?
I'd like you to keep your responses to the above questions in mind as you move on to learn about the origin of
self-concept, and the role of intuition in development. It is important that you understand how you got to this
point so you can accept and forgive yourself, act differently, and create your heart's desire. |
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